Welp, that sucked. After the Oilers play like garbage for 10 minutes, they come back from a 3 goals deficit to tie the game, then continue to play like garbage. A bittersweet homecoming for the team and its fans that wanted to celebrate a 3-0 series lead while seeing the Ducks on the brink of elimination. Can Brent and Craig find any positives in a lacklustre effort, or are they so confused by a 5pm start time that they don’t know how to function? Let’s see!
Round 2 – Game 3
Ducks 6 Oilers 3
Craig Douglas: Everyone’s plans to have the Oil sweep the Weasels have been scuppered! I’m just kidding, no one ever thought that the dumb Ducks would get swept, and that brings us to recap game three of the series. If the Oil were never going to sweep these clowns then it was essential and inevitable that they were going to have to lose a game before they could win the series in five, six, or seven games. Now that they’ve checked the little box that says lose at least one game, they can get back to doing what they do.
The only thing that really stings about losing the game last night is the waste of a comeback when down three goals. That fucking brilliant third goal by McDavid goes all for naught and that’s kind of a shame. All of the energy that burst back into the crowd and the building when they managed to tie it was a pretty great thing to behold, and then that weaselly fucking team managed to retake the lead so quickly seems like a real lost opportunity and a waste of momentum. Oh well, I don’t want to lament it too much, like I said above, if a sweep was never happening, then a game loss had to occur before a series win could occur. If the 7-0 game vs San Jose was the Tuesday Travesty, then we can just call this the Sunday Shitshow and move on to better things just like the team did in round one.
Referee Bitch Sesh part XXVII: They still suck. It’s incredible. I’m tired of even bitching about it.
They let Bald Idiot and many of the other shitheads get away with everything, and it’s so blatant that I just can’t… I don’t even know what to say. Once in a while they manage to maintain consistency within an individual game, and last night was kind of an example of that, except for Bald Idiot getting away with everything (which they’ve been real fucking consistent about) – but there is no consistency from game to game. I realize it is almost always different referees every night, even in the playoffs, but it is the same fucking rule book from night to night. Consistency is probably never going to happen and I should probably stop complaint about it, but it’s fun to complain. and also I’m totally correct so I’ll just keep on complaining! Well, at least until they call fucking Bald Idiot for one of his many, many infractions.
Brent Oliver: The Oilers played well for 15 minutes. Yup, by my count, the tail end of the 1stperiod and the beginning of the 2nd period to tie the game had the Oilers firing on all pistons and taking their game to Ducks. The problem? The other 45 minutes the Ducks hit, crashed, scored, banged and brought their game to the Oilers who frankly, sucked. Talbot had his usual piss-poor game in every 5 games, so we got that out of the way for this series. I see a big, bounce back 35 save performance in game 4, and every forward looking at that gorgeous McDavid tying goal in an attempt to emulate those moves.
This brings the inevitable observation that the Oilers have played poorly in the last two games – shitty last night, and Talbot saving their bacon in Game 2. This can’t possibly continue so I’ll echo the feeling of all Oilers fans this morning by thinking these games were a mistake you took home from the bar. Let’s just hope that mistake grabs their clothes, leaves by the time we have to go to work, and loses your phone number. And moves. To Korea.
NHL Draft Lottery 2017 or
Dispatch from the office of cautionary tales and laughing at others misfortune
Craig Douglas: Fans of teams in the Pacific Division and around the league got a little taste of their own assholes on Saturday as the lottery balls bounced rather crazily and some teams and their fans had their hopes dashed by Lady Luck and Mrs. Dash. Fans around the league, especially Canucks Fans: “Wah Wah, the Oilers won the first overall pick, change the rules before they ruin everything.”
NHL: “Fine, we hear you. The new rules are in place.”
Fans: “They won it again, this is so unfair. We demand further changes.”
NHL: “Sigh. Okay, we’ll change the rules even more, but do you know what a cautionary tale is?”
Fans: “Just change em, these Oilers are really making a mockery of the draft with all of their top picks.”
NHL: “Please enjoy these further changes, but remember these rules apply to all teams and not just the Oilers.”
Fans this past weekend: “OH NO!”
Oilers fans: “Enjoy your new rules and continued mediocrity, idiots.”
Fans: “OH NO!”
Yes, that’s right, all of the rules that fans, rival GMs, and everyone else with vocals complained about are now coming home to roost and it is pure comedy gold. These babies should have realized that the way these things work is slow and cyclical. By the time they finished complaining and by the time the NHL got around to doing something about it, the Oilers, aka the whole reason for all of their petulant complaints, were already out of the woods. Now there are other teams within those woods and the new rules are lurking around every corner. That’s right fans of the Canucks and Avs, those rules that your whining helped create just fucked you over. So remember this all summer long when you’re picking outside of the top three, you helped put the rules there to save the world from your ineptitude or something. All your fucking big baby whining indirectly helped the Oil and hurt your franchises and you basically begged for it to happen.
Was that schadenfreude? I think that was schadenfreude. Anyhoo, Game 4 on home ice happens Wednesday with the Goddless Ducks returning from Kelowna (for some reason) to try and even up the series. Can the Oil get back to playing well and take a stranglehold, or is everyone just too worried about the words to the US National Anthem?
See you Thursday, In The Box.