Mar. 13, 2007 - Issue #595: Mark Templeton
In the Box
Exclamation points make everything awesome!
Hey! Whee! Eight-game losing streak. Oilers outscored 32-6 in that dismal stretch. Last Oiler win was Feb 23. A gazillion injured Oilers. The team is about to be mathematically eliminated from the playoffs. Hockey is fun. Crap. Spring is coming, though. The snow is melting. Here comes the thawed dogshit. That stink will be the perfect accompaniment to Flames playoff games. Zing. Even mocking the Flames doesn’t help. It just seems hollow.
Streaking!
This current eight-game losing streak is still short of the NHL record 17
straight losses suffered by the 1993 Sharks and the 1975 Capitals. The
longest Oiler losing streak is 11 straight games of futility during the
1993/94 season. The longest I could watch any of the last few games was about
10 minutes straight without pacing around the room or playing video games.
DY
Cheering!
The Oilers aren’t doing anything this spring, but there’s still a
lot of hockey to come. The interesting thing about situations like this is
who people cheer for and why. Like most fans, I have an extensive list of
criteria that I go to when I’m deciding which team to cheer for in any
given contest. Like a lot of folks from around these parts, I tend to pull
for Canadian teams (excluding the Flames). For some reason, I still have a
soft spot for the original six teams as well. I will cheer for a team if they
are doing well, but have historically sucked. I will cheer on teams that play
an exciting style of hockey (Lightning, Penguins). I will even pick sides
based on one player. I was happy to see Andreychuk finally win a cup with
Tampa. Conversely, I would rather eat my own crap than cheer on any team that
included Donald Brashear. But what it all really comes down to is the time
honoured adage of ABC—Anybody But Calgary. TB
Whining!
I feel like a heel. I’ve watched bits and pieces of the last few games
but I have found it difficult to manufacture interest. With little or no
emotional buy-in and most of the Oilers I enjoy watching (Ales Hemsky, Jarret
Stoll, Ethan Moreau, Petr Sykora) not playing right now it is just above
watching paint dry on the interest level. Yes, I know Sykora isn’t
injured; I said “playing” not “dressing for games.”
With absolutely no realistic sniff at the playoffs, it’s been quite a
long time since the Oilers played games that mean absolutely nothing. How do
baseball fans (outside of, say, New York and maybe Atlanta) keep interested
in their teams? There are twice as many games in a ball season and most teams
seem to be out of the playoff picture by July. It must be the steroid-filled
hot dogs. Or the ballpark franks. DY
Looking!
So, other than seeing the few remaining Oilers and some hopefuls play out the
season, what have we got to watch, sports fans? The NCAA Final Four tourney
has some appeal, despite being basketball. It’s a great spectacle; crap
sport. The U of A Pandas Hockey team is headed to the Nationals once again
this weekend trying for their fifth CIS title in six years. NFL players are
getting arrested again, baseball spring training has begun and the World
Curling Championships are in town at the end of the month. Curling—OK.
The Patch—oh yeah. Drinking with the oldtimers. DY
Rationalizing!
The Oilers stand a good chance of gaining a top five draft pick. The only
team bad enough to allow more than one Oiler goal in a game since Feb 25 has
been the lowly Calgary Flames who allowed TWO WHOLE GOALS against on Mar 3.
DY
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