Apr. 04, 2012 - Issue #859: Spring Style
Wrath of the Titans
The myth-misses are worse than in Clash of the Titans. Gods, their accents arising from all over Europe, are petty thugs with Freudian father-son issues. The revenge plot and its kickstarter's change-of-heart are equally baffling. His wife killed before we met her, Perseus (Sam Worthington) rounds up a few men (and one token love interest) as if they're in a heist flick. In comic relief comes Poseidon's rogue son Agenor (apparently, even for a movie with the Minotaur, his famous son Theseus wasn't available). And weapon-forger Hephaestus springs into the mix straight from the pages of ... Dickens?!?
The spectacle bloats so full of itself, it's emptied of drama. Not one but three Cyclops (triclops?) pop up. The map for a massive, constantly moving stone labyrinth gets tossed, but our heroes still make it to Hades. Meanwhile, we're left in entertainment-purgatory. Forget gods getting it on with humans; here, non-story meets quasi-show and begets a demi-star.
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